Monday isn't always bad...

Well my days and nights have been totally mixed up, I finally fell asleep at a decent hour last night and stayed awake when I woke up this morning after getting Gracie off to school. I need to try to keep my self motivated so I got my ass off the couch took my shower and made my dinner for the next two nights, and then got the kitchen all nice and cleaned and cleaned the bathroom and now it is only a few minutes before 1 in the afternoon and I am amazed at how much I actually did today, it feels pretty good. I think I might even crack a cold one lol After a few important phone calls I have to make I will be done for the day. Ohhhh what did I make you ask... Well for tonight's dinner I made stuffed cabbage which isn't one of the things I specialize in lol it usually falls apart and ends up being cabbage soup it's good but not quit like my moms or grams would have made. This time I did it a lil different and it didn't fall apart hopefully it taste as good as it looks. I also made a meat loaf for tommorow dinner but I think the kids will dip into it tonight, I don't think they will eat the stuffed cabbage. My meatloaf is actually a specialty, it's a simple recipe and I don't always do it exactly the same depending on the ingredients I have on hand but rather the ketchup I use Catalina dressing in the mix and BBQ sauce on top, it usually is very yummy. I pride myself on my cooking , I am not an expert chef there has been a few things I have botched lol but for the most part I don't get any complaints. My grandma was a god cook I learned a lot from her, but I learned most everything from my mother she has always been an amazing cook. She had a catering business for several years and was at high demand. I wished she would have had a chance to open a Resturant I know she wanted to but unfortunalty it never happened. Actually I think she learned a lot from my granny ( my dads mom) she had a lot of kids and always cooked big and cooked good as a lot of southern mommas do. There's a lot of good cooks in my family lol that's prob why we're all fat! All that good down home southern comfort food, which you know damn well most of it ain't healthy lol. My daughter is becoming a very good cook to, she likes spending time with my mom and they cook together, they are very close I'm so glad they have that bond. If you ask Grace she will tell you she's a better cook then me lol she says " anyone can cook but not everyone can make it taste good" . Which is a true statement lol so we always have a joke when one of us is cooking about wether it's gonna taste good or not . She's a comedian half the time and a lil snot the other half... Bipolar runs in the family too lol. Well that's all for today peeps Again I have to add I'm haveing trouble editing to excuse the typos

Day n night

I love my son and daughter. Grace is doing so good in school she has lots of friends and seems to actually like it now. I remember my freshman year in school. While I have never been a fan of school, I came home on the first day of kindergarten and too my mom " it's ok but I don't think I will go everyday.." Lol and I never did! But if I had to pick a time at school from what I can remember freshman years would be my favorite. Anyways back to to Grace... I hope she continues to enjoy school. I feel bad because she has had to change schools so many times, but then again she is a social butterfly and has friends all over the map! She is a smart cookie though and she is like me makes the best of any situation, she is smarter then me in many ways ( the lil shit) she has way more street smarts or world knowledge or whatever then I did when I was her age. I have always said she is an old soul. I know she will comin tie to flourish and really make herself something one day. My son Coty he is a whole different breed of kid! Well he's not a kid no more :( he is a grown ass man, he will be 19 this year... I was 19 when I had him omg I feel old! He has always been a good kid , very rarely would I really have to scold him for anything. Well some of the few things that do I have to look back and laugh. For example I woke up about 4 am one day, Coty was 4 or 5 and he was in the living room, I asked him what is he doing. I don't recall him answering but he was playing with our birds, one was o it flying around and the other was in his pocket.... Yup I said pocket lol. But he really was just playing he loves animals, he always had some random rotten or bug or whatever caught outside, when he was like 12 he would wake me up at the break of dawn on the weekends to let me know he was going snake hunting lol. We had a lil tiny piece of wooded area and pond by us and that's were he went . He is still an animal lover he currently has 4 snakes as pets . I say he's a different breed of kid because, he really is. 99 percent of the kids his age are a mess, partying, drugs, haveing baby's, already been arrested a few times, the list goes on. Coty has done none of that. He is so chill, he likes hanging at home. I'm not trying to make it sound like he is some sort of hermit or something, he likes going places as a family when we do stuff, I'm glad my son likes hanging with us. He has friends don't get me wrong, Coty is very likeable, people enjoy his company he doesn't give anyone any reason not to like him. Don't let his big teddy bear ass fool ya, I feel sorry for that first person that crosses the line with him, I can see him opening a can of whoop ass on someone like no other, he is as strong as a damn ox. I have always said how strong my husband is and Coty is way stronger! He might live at home till he's forty but that's ok lol like I said people like Coty he is fun to hang out with and actually when he gets going he is fucking hilarious he is always cracking us up over something. Well I love both my kids so much with all my heart on soul, I have no idea what I would do with out them!!!! *again a side note I'm haveing a hard time editing for some reason so excuse the typos...

Gracie

My daughter has been such a gift to me and I couldn't be more thankful. When I say gift I really mean it, she was born just a couple weeks after I lost my grandmother so I feel like my gramma sent this wonderful girl to me to help try and fill a void in my heart after she left this world. And my heart has been overflowing ever since. Before Grace came into this world she was already giving me a run for my money! At the later stages of  my pregnancy it became apparent that I had gestational diabetes. And via ultra sounds she seems to be growing very well. In the last month she was to big to tell how big she actually was anymore LOL! I was scheduled for a c section on a Monday morning. The Friday before that Grace decided she was not waiting those couple days and I was in labor. We went to the hospital about 6 and after all the prepping I was in the O.R. just after midnight. My hubby, her dad was with me and sat right by my head hold the puke bucket... poor guy lol. After what seemed like forever the Dr announces its a girl (which we already knew) and they cleaned her up and bundle her up and brought her to me. I couldn't hold her yet because I was still strapped down to the table but daddy held her and put her to my face so I could kiss her. she was a big baby almost 13 pounds!! One of the Drs even said "hurry up and weigh her, I gotta see this" and another Dr said " she was born with a spoon in her mouth". The nurses and every other person in the hospital couldn't get over her. She was so adorable. Came out bright eyed and a head full of black hair. She was taken to the nursery and I was taken to recover in my room. They had to run some extra test beyond the normal ones. She had apparently had a bowl movement while she was still in me, which can be dangerous if she ingested any of it. She was fine perfectly healthy. My mom and hubby left after we were settled in for what was left of the night. The next couple days we spent in the hospital and had visitors from family and hospital staff that had to come see this big baby they had heard all about.

Big brother came up and he was shy as usual and I dont think he knew what to think of her. Daddys friend Eric drove us home from the hospital. She was a good baby, very rarely got sick, and the 'terriable twos' wasnt terrible at all. She developed fast, never liked baby food, she wanted the real thing! She gave up the bottle and started walking before she turned a year old. One thing that stuck with her for a looooong time was her binky. I gave her one right away when she was born because she was sucking on her hands and I didnt want her to become a thumb sucker thinking it would be easier to break her of the binky then the thumb. Well she was really attached to that binky, I should have bought stock in binkys we went through so many. We always had to have a few back ups, god forbid we loose one! The binky lasted till she was almost 7! Yeah it got to the point were I would tell her 'if you want it you keep track of it' and she would too! She always made sure I had one in my purse when we went somewhere and even started to get embarrassed by it and would only have it when no one was around. Then one day after me suggesting for at least a year, she just decided she was done with it. So I put the last one in my jewelery box and there is were it still sits.

Grace is going to be 13 years old at the end of this month. And it seems like yesterday that she was born. I cant believe how time flys! She is still a good kid! She has an old soul. She gets along great with adults and is very mature for her age, she always has been. But she is not mature in a bad way like some of these 13 year olds are today out there. She is not 'fast'. She is not trying to grow up and act like an idiot and boy crazy and make up crazy and party crazy, ugh I dont know what I would do if she acted like a typical teenager. She has a very good head on her shoulders and I am so proud of the lil lady she is becoming.

Grace is a clothes and shoes alcoholic. She loves the mall and shopping! She has a great sense of style. Some styles dad doesnt like lol but she doesnt try to get away with anything over the top, and is respectful of his wishes. Grace is a daddys girl, she always has been.

I dont mind at all. I am happy they have the bond they do. Her and I also have a great bond, I love her dearly but we do but heads sometimes. Sometimes I wish she would just crawl up in my lap twirl my hair, cuddle and fall asleep like when she was little. I will always hold on to and cherish the memories of her like that. I look forward to the great memories that will come!

July

July: The heart of summer! Americas birthday! It is also 2 of the most important females in my life birthdays month; my mother & my daughter. It is also a bitter month as a reminder of when I lost my grandmother. This month in my blog I will feature all 3 of the above mentioned. They all have effected my life in such a way I dont know what i would do with out them. Although my gramma is on the other side she is still with me and the things she taught me while here still are certainly still with me! America the beutiful and we sure know how to celebrate it! Fireworks have seemily been none stop since before the 1st of the month and will continue for the next couple weeks. My poor pregnant dog is a nervous wreck which I am sure is not good for her in her condition. But we will comfort her as much as possiable. My cat I have to laugh at... He is 7 years old and has heard fireworks and storms ect several times. SO I dont understand while all the sudden while there are fireworks going on he is doing an army crawl from one room to the next like he is under attack! I feel bad that he is scared but at the same time its hillarious to watch him. My mother & daughter -

I hope everyone enjoys there summer!!

Coty

Today we are having a Birthday Party for my son Coty. He is turning 17! I am really having a hard time wrapping my head around this...my baby is 17, where the hell did the last 17 years go, serioulsy someone please tell me?????

I remember The days surrounding his birth like they were yesterday (just dont ask me what actually happened yesterday cuz that I dont remember(lol). The day before I went into full blown labor I new it was gonna happen any second. I had been having braxton hicks contractions all day, everywheere we went my husband brought a towel for under my butt incase my water broke. We were telling family and friends I was in labor. The next day that I actaully went into full blown labor was a Sunday morning, it was Mothers Day. I woke up to use the bathroom and get ready for the day. As soon as I sat up in bed, gush my water had broke or so I thought. My mother made me eat a quik breakfast before we left for the hospital knowing they wouldnt feed me untill after I gave birth. Once at the hospital they wanted to "check' me and come to find out my water wasnt actuall broke it was just my mucus plug. After walking around for an hour or so my water did actually break on its own. That was like opening a flood gate, I had ALOT of water!! Then in bed hooked to all kinds of wires is how I spent the remainder of the day. At some point during the day I was transferred to a very nice labor and delivery room it was very cozy and had plenty of room for all my visitors. My labor was thankfully very smooth. I was having good contractions but no pain. The Dr's and nurses kept asking in amazement was I sure i didnt need anything for pain. The kept saying 'wow your still smileing". Around dinner time the nurse brought in a beutiful dinner, I was starved and then I find out its not for me I cant have it! Daddy enjoyed it , jerk lol. I was still feeling pretty good going into the evening, I was dialated to a 6 only and they started giving me patosin to get me going faster. That was about the same time my sister scared me into getting an epidural. I am glad i did because the pain did start to come, boiy did it! Within a very short time of getting the patoson and epidural I started to feel the pressure and need to push. I told the nurse to please check and she said "no way i just did I am sure it hasnt changed", well she was wrong I was fully efaced and ready to push! At this point it got kinda crazy. The nurse and intern had me pushing pushing pushing and I was getting wore out fast. Plus I felt like i was on fire down below. I didnt know at the time but come to find out later, the reason for the "burning" was becasue of "ripping". I had my mom on one leg and my hubby holding the other leg. My sister was standing by my head. I wasnt suppossed to have that many people in there but we got away with it. After what seemed like forever and the hardest thing I ever had to do, he was out. They had to getting him going he wasnt breathing as good as they wanted him to, NICU had to come in put a tube down his throat and clear him up. in the meantime i am in screaming miserable pain getting sewed up from stem to stern! Finally i got to hold my precious baby boy. It was the most amazing thing ever! He was 9 pounds 10 ounces and 21 inches long born at 9 ish at night. Back then they still kept the babys in the nursery. So off he went and I got to get showered and cleaned up and settled in my room. They brought him to me one more time that night. My mom and hubby went out for a celebration beer and brought me back McDonalds. The next day at the hospital was busy busy busy. Coty was brought to me bright and early for feeding. I tried the breast feeding thing but it just wasnt working for me. There were all kinds of classes available. But I choose not to take any. I was perfectly content spending time alone with my baby in between having family and friends come to see him.

I could go on and on about my son. He has been such a joy and still is. I have so many stories about him. He was very sick when he was a baby and that was very scary, but we got through it and he was ok. He was always a quiet kid and he still is. He can be a comedian though really and often has us cracking up. He has always loved his animals, weather it was a hamster he was putting in a tonka truck and crashing it, or a bird in his pocket or a dog he thought would like to have a "fun ride" via hanging it from its leash around the swingset! He is mommas boy even if he wouldnt admit it. I have been told how much he looks like me, but I see his dad in him too.

I still cant beleive 17 years have passed!! I just dont know how I am ever gonna grasp it, and when 30 years have passed I still wont have been able to grasp it. Our babys grow up so fast.

He will always be my baby!

I love both my kids soooo much!!

Kids

My kids in 2003

my kids now 2010